How to Tackle the Restless Adolescence of Your Child
Adolescence is an age the kids are fond of and the parents fear. A mixed bag of tantrums, maturity in some areas, many sentiments, rigid thoughts, and ready to soar anger are some of the key identifiers of this stage of life. You as a parent may find it difficult to cope with the situations your teenager may often throw. Here are some possible ways of dealing through the phase.
Your wit, wisdom, experience, and logic may not be very effective now. Be very patient and calm. You may need to work consciously at it. Being reactive can only provoke or instill fear in the child. Even your child undergoes a subconscious conflict and mood swings. So somewhere, he or she is also struggling hard with the changes in his or her personality.
Respect The Perspective Your Child Has
While trying to explain the brackets of rights and wrongs, you may actually be imposing your standards of life on your child. He or she has his or her own perspective, which you need to know, respect, and if required try to subtly shape. Also, do not compare.
Trust your Teenager
With an acutely vulnerable self esteem, your kid is trying hard to look good, feel good, and gain fame. He or she must be struggling hard for recognition. He or she must be trying to be important to his or her friends, teachers, teams, etc. Fear of rejection is at an all time high. Here, you need to trust your teenager and be proud of him or her. It will all shine through. Make him or her know you have faith in him or her and its okay to fail at times.
Help Your Child Evolve
Understand that you are dealing with a different individual and you will need to let go at some level. Do not stop your teenager from experimenting, taking calculated risks, and getting moderately hurt. All this is a part of learning and you will need to make way for it. Just help your child understand that whatever he or she does in his or her own space is okay.
Set some rules of living in the house. Define some performance and behavioral lines for your child. Stick hard to them. Discipline needs full polishing in this age. Clearly explain that any action or words of your child must not hurt others in any way and that he or she needs to respect the others space. All the while, assure him or her that you are there. If dealt well, this instills confidence in adolescents and helps them grow in a positive sphere.
The revolting attitude the adolescents develop requires parental tactics. You need to be flexible. Rigidity will just not work here. You will often not approve the ways your kid follows. But, take it easy. Reacting sharply will only aggravate the issue. Sit and talk like a friend. Accept your kid as he or she is. Do not judge. Give live examples to help your kid understand your reasons. Give him or her, the option of disagreeing. Try to understand his or her logic. Your idea is to shape a sensible individual and not someone you can control.